Only Eight Paychecks

Sometimes it's hard to believe that it's been a little over 4 months since my husband went back to work.  Other days, it seems so fresh.  There are still days when I get a call from him some time other than on his lunch break and my heart sinks wondering if it's happening again.  There are times in conversation, if he's had a bad day at work, that I express my worry about him losing his job.  I am sure it's in the back (or some days, the front) of his mind too...it's changed us...we no longer take his employment for granted.

To think about it happening again exhausts me.  To think about walking that path again makes me cry out to God throughout the day...thanking Him for His provision, but praying for continued rest. 

I guess I imagined my husband would go back to work and things would come together more quickly for us.  The evidence is still all around us: debt, an almost non existent savings, projects that are still on hold, hopes and dreams that we have yet to act upon.  I forget that it's just been four months...that we have just been through two years of hard stuff...that this is still the time to heal....time to rest...to keep gathering up the pieces and just walk on.  Yesterday, my God whispered this to my heart.  He reminded me to slow down...that we've only had eight paychecks.  We've had eight paychecks!  My heart is thankful.